First Day on the Job
by hellburner21
Summary: AU where Bellamy becomes commander and has the AI implanted. Biggest ships on the show, Bellarke vs Clexa, the ultimate battle for Clarke's affections is about to go down inside a human compatible AI.
1. Chapter 1

"This is stupid," Bellamy complained, his dark curly bangs flopping in his face as he leaned to one side to glare at his sister.

"Clarke said Lexa would meditate to talk to the other commanders," Octavia grumbled back. They'd been trying this for only a few minutes and it was already too long to be in a room with just Bellamy. The girl loved her older brother, but he was a _pain in the ass_ and his inability to shut up and concentrate was making her consider walking off the top floor of the skyscraper they were in.

"Well, it doesn't seem to be working."

"It might if you actually tried, Bell."

"How do we know Lexa wasn't just lying?" he barked back in typical Bellamy fashion.

Octavia whirled around on her heals, arms crossed, eyes blazing. She was so tired of that distrustful side of Bell that reared its ugly head whenever he was uncomfortable with what was going on. Granted, she probably had something to do with it.

His whole life he'd had to treat everyone except her and their mom like the enemy. He didn't have the luxury of learning to trust other people. _Until_ they hit the ground and Clarke Griffin didn't give him a choice –or at least that was how Octavia tended to look at it.

"You believe Clarke don't you?" she sighed, rolling her eyes. This was NOT the time to get into a fight with him. Delegates of twelve clans were waiting a few floors up for the names of all the previous commanders.

"I believe Clarke is telling the truth about what Lexa said, but how do we know Lexa was telling Clarke the truth?"

"Bell, we don't have anything else to go on." This time Bellamy actually got up and walked over to his sister. Octavia took an annoyed step back.

"O, she convinced Clarke to let a bomb drop on you and everyone else in Ton DC. Then she abandoned Clarke, and us, in Mount Weather, and you both expect me to just go on blind faith? There are twelve clans worth of people ready to kill all of us if they can prove I'm not a real commander."

"You _are_ a real commander Bell, whether they like it or not," Octavia said. "And if Clarke's right, some small part of Lexa is in you now too, whether _you_ like that or not."

The door creaked open and both their heads snapped to attention. Clarke's long, dread-locked head of blond hair shook over her face as she walked in. Her eyes darted around, avoiding Bellamy.

"How's it going?" she asked. Octavia shook her head.

"Fine," Bellamy growled.

Clarke sent Octavia a look. The girl shrugged and walked toward the door, letting her hand drop onto Clarke's shoulder.

"Tag, you're it," she sighed and left.


	2. Chapter 2

"Clarke," Bellamy began, stepping toward her. She held up her hand to stop him. She tried to look too, tried to make an effort toward something more normal, but ever since he'd accepted the AI she just couldn't quiet bring herself to share his gaze.

"Save it," she sighed and walked toward the window. Their shoulders collided as she did. He hadn't gotten out of her way. He hadn't move a single muscle. She could tell, because since accepting the AI he hadn't been able to put on a real shirt, either. The flesh on the back of his neck was still too soft.

Clarke kept walking anyway.

"We have twelve clans waiting outside," she continued, looking out at the setting sun. "Whatever the problem is, we need it fixed now."

"How are we going to fix this Clarke?" Bellamy growled back in his usual defiant fashion. It might have made her smile, if she hadn't also been wondering if maybe it was _Lexa's_ usual defiance she was hearing.

"I'm Flame Keeper. It's my job to fix this."

"How can you fix this if you won't even look me in the eye Clarke?"

She turned around slowly, but still couldn't meet his gaze. _She knew he'd noticed, but she'd still hoped…_

"It's not you I'm avoiding Bellamy, I promise."

"It's just me in here, Clarke. _I_ promise."

His voice quieted and her gaze moved up over his bare torso to his face and found his green eyes for the first time in days. Somehow, it felt like longer, which made her wonder if it was Lexa she was seeing. Had something changed behind that deep green since the last time she'd seen it? She couldn't pick out anything new set against his freckles. _Maybe she'd just missed their partnership that much, and maybe not…_

"With the other AI you could see Alie, but I don't see anyone. I'm alone in here. What if it didn't work?" he continued. Clarke shook her head, still keeping his gaze in hers. Now that she could see his face, she saw the frown that hid the fear.

"It _did_ work Bellamy, otherwise, you would still be seeing Alie too."

"But now I don't see anyone. I don't feel any different aside from my sore neck." Bellamy paused for a while. "I'm sorry. I know how badly you wanted Lexa to be in here, but she isn't."

"Lexa never saw anyone either, not like Alie. She had to concentrate to see them. She told me she had to meditate."

"What if she lied? What if this is all _just another lie_?"

"Then it never would have gotten Alie out of you."

"Maybe that destroyed it. Maybe to get rid of Alie, Lexa and the rest of the commanders had to die too," Bellamy argued and turned away.

"Maybe." Clarke pursed her lips and moved closer. "Maybe you're just afraid that you're still not alone in your own head."

"You didn't have any right to give me this," he whispered as Clarke set her hand on his arm.

"It was the only way to save you."

"It didn't save me, this is just a different kind of being captive, Clarke. I'm the commander now. Do you know how many grounders I've killed and helped kill?"

"Was I supposed to let Alie kill you?"

"Maybe."

"We don't decide who lives and dies, remember?" she said. He looked at her again, meeting his eyes, she could see the truth. He really was Bellamy and _only_ Bellamy behind those eyes. However the AI worked, it hadn't changed him, hadn't taken his control like Alie.

"Right," he muttered after a while and pulled away from her touch. The hint of a smile twitched the sides of his lips. "But someone else will be deciding that about us if I don't know those names. How much did Lexa tell you about meditation?"


	3. Chapter 3

Bellamy sat on the ground listening to the endless drum solo that was Clarke's pacing boots. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter and tried to concentrate _. Concentrate on what?_ He had no god damn clue. _Was he supposed to think about Lexa, about the commander title, or just concentrate on concentrating?_ He wasn't especially fond of concentrating on his vague memories of Lexa's face, so he settled on concentrating on the idea of the commander position.

 _Commander ,_ he thought. Tap.

 _Being a commander_. Tap.

 _That grounder word for commander… what is that?!_ _Clarke's said it a thousand times, maybe he should ask her._ Tap. Tap.

 _Damn it!_

"Clarke," he sighed. "I'm really trying here, but you're pacing's not helping."

Silence.

 _Okay… now what?_ He didn't have the princess's feet to distract him, but it still wasn't enough.

 _Heda!_ That was it, that was what Clarke called the commander, or what the grounders called the commander… or what his people called him. He was really going to have to start making more of an effort to learn some of this stuff.

Foucs damn it! Concentrating on the idea of the commander wasn't working, and Bellamy had no idea how to concentrate on concentrating. He still wasn't happy with the idea of concentrating on Lexa.

He'd taken one course on old Earth religions in school. Many of them used meditation rituals some of them centered around a focus on breathing in order to calm the mind. He could try that. _Why didn't I think of that sooner?_

Bellamy Blake closed his eyes and focused his inner eye on the sound of his own breathing. The only problem was that the room was so damn quiet the only wound left when he stopped thinking was his own breathing… and Clarke's.

Her breathing was steady, strong, just like her. Even after the hell she'd been through time and again, nothing shook that foundation of moral high ground she'd climbed onto and never fallen from, no matter how many people tried to shove her off of it. She was like a cat, always landing on her feet no matter how many times she'd fallen from grace. Each time she got knocked down, she came back better, smarter, stronger, and never lost her compassion, the light in her eyes that he admired so much.

"Hello, Commander," said a hauntingly familiar voice.

Bellamy opened his eyes. He was in the council room, looking at the commander's, or Heda's, throne. Clarke was gone, and in her place a young woman with dark hair had draped herself over the arms of the throne. She stared down at him through eyes encircled by dripping, black paint.

"Lexa," he answered.


	4. Chapter 4

"I once told Clarke if I were to die, my spirit would choose its next commander wisely… I guess I was wrong," Lexa sighed as Bellamy cleared his throat and tried to wrap his mind around exactly what was going on.

"Heda, I need your help," he grunted, hoping he was pronouncing the title properly. "I need the names of the commanders… Clarke's waiting." He added, not sure if that would help.

Lexa was a program, just a program interfacing with him the same way Alie had. He shivered involuntarily. _This isn't exactly like Alie_ , he reminded himself. Lexa wasn't controlling him, or at least it didn't seem like it. _She is also a lot less polite than Alie_ … Still, Lexa was just as much of a computer program as the chip now in the back of his neck, and one side of him knew that. The other side was looking at someone he recognized, and she seemed very, very real. But _all_ of him needed to know which side was right, and how much Lexa was actually in the program. He had to know… _for Clarke's sake_.

"Clarke is not the commander," Lexa answered, but he could swear she lingered on the princess's name. "You are."

"I won't be for long if you don't give me those names."

"Being the commander isn't about names Bellamy, it's about courage."

"Great, but I don't think the other clan leaders are going to buy that."

"They are not going to buy anything," she growled. "At least nothing that is coming from you unless you make them."

"I can't do that without those names."

Lexa turned her head to face him. Her eyes narrowed.

"Maybe you should have thought of that before you slaughtered the army I sent to protect you."

Bellamy jumped up.

"The last time you promised your help, your people abandoned us in Mount Weather," he reminded her.

"I guess that makes us the same, doesn't it," Lexa growled, slowly sitting up.

"What do you mean?"

"We both do what we believe best serves our people; even if it costs us the people we love the most."

For a moment, the air was quiet as he shared her understanding eyes.

"Mount Weather cost you Clarke," he breathed.

"And you're massacre cost you your sister," Lexa scoffed back.

Bellamy took a step forward.

"Leave Octavia out of this," he demanded.

"How? She takes up half your head."

Bellamy froze. He'd forgotten already. The room, the conversation, it was all so lifelike. The AI was so much like Lexa, such a convincing representation; he'd actually forgotten it was all just in his head.

 _Should I tell her she's isn't real?_ He shook his head. What would that knowledge change? He would probably only make the program madder.

"Please, Heda," he sighed. "You're people deserve to know that we aren't lying to them like Ontari."

Lexa cocked her head to the side and untangled herself from the throne. She sat straight and strong, just like the real Lexa the night that he'd broken in to save Clarke on the word of a liar. Bellamy shut his eyes.

"Listen carefully," Lexa began. His eyes shot open. _That worked?_ "I'll only say the names once."


	5. Chapter 5

When Bellamy finished rattling off the last set of names, the room was silent. Only the wind blowing through the open window behind the throne made enough noise to assure him that his world was still real. Clarke took a step closer and leaned in. She'd been patiently standing at his side, waiting like everyone else to hear the names of the past commanders. _Well, now he'd said them_. She didn't need to act so tense. Lexa told him everything he needed to know.

"They're waiting for you to speak to them," she whispered, flipping the little bronze medallion in her hand. It was the same kind of strange pendent that used to rest between Lexa's eyebrows.

"About what?" he asked, trying not to let her hear his voice shaking or think about how much he didn't want her to stick the pendent on his forehead.

"Anything. They are trying to get a feel for what your rule will be like."

Bellamy swallowed and flicked his gaze off Clarke and out at the crowed of stone faced grounders. He looked at Octavia, standing in the front. She seemed less tense than Clarke, but more anxious, bouncing subtly on the balls of her feet, as she waited with the rest of them to hear him talk, to hear him _rule_ …

 _When was the last time he'd given a speech?_ Probably before everything went to hell, or at least before it went _further_ into hell. He'd spoken to everyone about the guard uniforms, how they had new meaning. _Lincoln had been there._ Bellamy took his eyes off his sister.

"I once told my people that if we buried our dead in the ground, it was ours. If we built, and we worked, and we lived, and we died on top of that ground, then that made it a part of us. That made us grounders. Over the past few months, everyone in this room has fought, and lost something, but we have all survived, and that makes us stronger. We fought for our minds like we fought each other for our lands. More than that, we fought for the right to have this coalition. The last commander died for it. This coalition is a part of us. It is our right. We are all grounders, and this is our coalition."

"Long live the commander," growled Roan from his corner of the room.

The room erupted into a sudden chorus of echoes.

"Long live the commander," they called. Bellamy shot Clarke a glance; she smiled and nodded back toward the ambassadors.

The crowd had fallen to its knees, including Octavia.

Bellamy bowed his own head back at them.

"Well done. In fact, your talent for inspirational speeches is almost as strong as your talent for killing," said a voice, clawing out of the silence.

The voice was calm, calm like death. Bellamy recognized the strange, artificial inflections and mild tone instantly. His head shot up, but no one else tried to move. Even Octavia stayed perfectly still as he raced down the steps between them.

He searched the crowed, turning his head and his gaze in every direction, but there was nothing. No reaction and no body for the voice.

 _Where is she?_

"Octavia," he grunted, but she stayed on her knees. He whipped back around to the only other person still standing straight. "Clarke?"

Clarke was exactly where he wanted her to be, still beside the throne, still watching him diligently. It was what stood behind her that brought the commander to his knees. Dark hair lay unnatural still on the head hidden behind the Flame keeper's windblown, golden locks.

A slender woman in a red dress stepped out to Clarke's side. Her wide, listless eyes scanned the room, hardly bothering to linger on Bellamy's head for more than a second as she entwined her fingers with Clarke's and pulled the strange bronze pendant from her hand.

"Alie," Bellamy swore.

"You think this can save you?" she whispered, turning the pendant over in her palm, not even bothering to look at him. "I've been inside your head, Commander. We both know you can't save anyone."

She held up the pendant again and the bronze began to melt away, revealing a strange, blue glow. Alie continued raising the tablet high, until the glowing chip was above her head, more pristine than he'd seen before.

Just then, something shifted to his right. Octavia was standing, walking forward, toward Alie and Clarke.

"O, don't," Bellamy hissed, watching how she gripped her sword, but when she reached the top of the steps the weapon clattered to the floor.

"Thank you for bringing them to me, Bellamy," Alie whispered. Clarke turned to look at Octavia. Then she titled back her head and opened her mouth. Octavia mimicked her.

"NO!" Bellamy shouted, but his legs were too heavy to stand. He watched as the girls swallowed the chips, and Alie finally let her eerie gaze meet his. She smiled.


	6. Chapter 6

Bellamy woke in a cold sweat. His chest heaved and he tried to force his breathing back to normal, but no matter how much he looked around the empty dark room or gripped the fur blankets, he couldn't shake the nightmare. Alie had felt so real, even more than she ever had in the City of Light. He wanted to forget, but his mind was nothing if not a stockpile of all the moments he regretted. It was impossible to ignore the latest mark on his soul.

The quiet of the room seemed to wrap around him and swallow him whole. He suddenly missed Arkadia and the drop ship, even the Ark. In such tight quarters, there was always the sound of someone else nearby. Bellamy wasn't looking for someone to talk things out with, but just knowing someone was there, his friends, his people, his sister, just someone, might have helped him calm down.

 _You're not actually alone_ , reminded a voice in the back of his head. He'd never been more relieved in his life to realize that voice was his own. He didn't need anyone else swimming around in his head right now. He wanted someone there, just to feel grounded, to feel like he wasn't alone, but he wasn't sure Lexa was the best medicine for his fear of being under an AI's control.

He knew what he really wanted. Deep down, he wanted to talk to Clarke. They hadn't known each other long, it was strange to think they were strangers on the Ark. He'd never let anyone in like he'd had to with her. He had to keep to himself to keep his mother and sister safe. He was closest to Octavia, but he could never show her when he was afraid or weak, not when he was supposed to be the one keeping her safe. Clarke had been there when he'd been broken. She'd seen more of him in a few short months than he'd shown anyone in his life, and it wasn't even by choice.

Bellamy closed his eyes. He'd thought he and Clarke shared so much. That was what made it so damn painful that she couldn't see when he was chipped.

"Clarke is blind to the people she cares for most," said a voice. Bellamy opened his eyes and rolled over. He was on the floor of the council room. Lexa was on the throne again.

"Is that how you managed to double cross her at Mount Weather?"

"And somehow she forgave us both."

"Why are you here Lexa?" he grumbled. _Please tell me she's not going to show up every time I think about Clarke._ She'd never go away.

"I'm here to scare the bad dreams away," she sneered and bared her teeth for him to see. "Grrrrr."

"I'm fine, just let me sleep."

"You can't sleep."

 _Maybe I could if you weren't lounging around in my head_ , he thought.

"What do you recommend?" he asked.

"You can't take care of your people without taking care of yourself."

 _You want a bet? I've been doing it since we landed on the wrong damn mountain._

"Again, what do you recommend?"

"Forgiveness, to start."

"As you already pointed out, that's what we have Clarke for."

"It's not enough is it?" Lexa sighed and sat up. "She could absolve you of anything, but at the end of the day it doesn't help, not anymore, not since you figured out she's doing it because she needs you. It's not about what you've done. Her forgiveness is about what she needs doing."

"She does what she thinks is best."

"Still doesn't help you sleep." Lexa stood. "You need to stop fighting what you've done."

Bellamy jumped to his feet too.

"The steps I climbed to reach that throne were the bodies of the people it's supposed to protect."

"And I fought and killed children to get that throne before you knew it existed."

"What does any of this have to do with Alie."

"You need to realize that she is no longer real. She's just in your head."

"Like you?"

Lexa pushed her lips together and her eyes narrowed.

"If you want to protect the people you care about, Bellamy," she sighed. "Don't let your past be your prison."

"How?"

"Be like Clarke, keep moving and focus on what you can do in the here and now."


	7. Chapter 7

"Are you ready for this?" Clarke asked. "Octavia said they're almost ready."

Bellamy nodded, solemnly. She'd gone back to avoiding his eyes. He couldn't help suspecting that it had something to do with his new ability to meditate. It made it harder. All of it.

How was he supposed to live his life like this? It was easy when she was angry, or they just disagreed. Even when she thought he was a terrible person, at least it was _just him_ she hated. She was his partner, not she was his flame keeper. She'd be that for the rest of their lives… It would never go back to the way it was. The last time he remembered her seeing him, really seeing him, she was saying goodbye.

"You know the names."

It wasn't what she really wanted to ask.

"I know them."

"How?"

"The program. It has them."

She looked at him. It would have been a relief if her eyes weren't begging him for more.

 _Don't tell her. She doesn't need to know._ 'Move forward like Clarke'. That's what Lexa told him. Admitting he was seeing her as a semi sentient individual would just send them back a step. 'Don't let the past be your prison'. _Don't tell her._

Suddenly, he was the one who couldn't make eye contact.

"Good," Clarke said quietly. "I guess we should go."

"Unless Lexa forgot one," he half-joked.

Her eyes sparked a little when they found his. He wasn't sure what to do with that. The look in her eye when she realized what he meant, was almost more than he could handle.

"She was there?"

"I don't know what it was, Clarke. I don't know if it's just my memories and the interface, but she seemed real. She seemed… alive."

He said them. The word he'd hated so much. They were bitter in his mouth, but they were the truth. It wasn't what he wanted. It wasn't what Lexa recommended, but it was Clarke needed.

"I," she started. "I don't know what to say."

"Neither does she." _Neither do I!_

"She doesn't just answer your questions are the other commanders there?"

 _Hell no._

"No."

"Bellamy, what does that mean?"

 _I don't know!_

"I don't know."

"C-can I talk to her?"

 _Can she?_

"I don't think so." _I can tell her you say hi, can't I?_ Was this going to be his life, transporting messages back and forth across his consciousness for Clarke and Lexa? _That might be a worse fate than being commander... or dying._

When he looked back at Clarke the spark was gone. She looked more like someone had kicked her in the gut.

"Guys, we have to go," Octavia called from the doorway. She must have come in while they were talking. _How much did she hear?_


	8. Chapter 8

"Lexa, I know you hate me, but I failed my own people. I need your help to make me a better leader to yours." He was back in the meeting room with her. He didn't know what to do anymore and he had to face the clan leaders. Facing Clarke hadn't really worked out in his favor.

"I'm dead Bellamy, not magic."

"Technically, you're an artificially intelligent program designed by the woman who ended the world."

"You're on your own – _wait what?"_

"I'm _not_ on my own! Maybe you were, Lexa, but your spirit should've stayed where it was, where everyone needed it," Bellamy barked. "I've got friends. I've got _Clarke!_ She made me commander when she gave me the Flame. This Heda has people defending him, and you're going to help me because you're inside _my_ head now."

Lexa took a step back. At first, Bellamy was afraid he'd angered her… or it. Then she brought down her head into a slow and respectful nod.

"Looks like my work here is done," she said. "You're starting to sound like a real commander."

He opened his eyes.

" _Bellamy?"_ Clarke was staring at him. The rest of the room was too, but he was looking at her.

They were waiting, waiting on him to repeat the names of the commanders. She was waiting for something else, something he couldn't give her. He wasn't Lexa.

He looked out at the crowd. _I'm not Lexa._

"I know the names, but I'm not going to say them," he started. Clarke's lips parted worriedly.

"Bell!" Octavia warned.

"There's nothing I can say to prove to you that I'm somehow worthy to be your commander. That is a choice you have to make for yourselves. The enslavement of the City of Light is over. I will be your commander by your choice or I won't be your commander, no matter what I have in my head. Your minds are your own. If you can't trust me, you can't follow me. The choice is yours, yours alone. I will only be Commander if you want me."

The room murmured for a moment. Then someone stepped out of the crowd. It was Cain.

"I'll follow you, Commander," he said and knelt down on his knee. Indra followed.

"I will follow you."

The rest of the room followed.


	9. Chapter 9

Epilogue

Bellamy:

After the ambassadors left, it was just the two of them. The Commander and his Flame Keeper. They could hear the celebration in the streets of Polis down below the tower.

"You did good Bellamy," Clarke whispered. He turned toward her.

"She's gone," he admitted. "Lexa's gone."

Clarke looked away.

"She was already gone. She died," she whispered, then turned her eyes to his. "But you didn't."

She closed the gap between them.

"You're here, Bellamy."

"We both are," he said.

She took his hand and looked at him they way he'd wanted her to for so long. She looked at him like her partner.

Clarke:

He looked at her and she knew, she knew for sure that it was Bellamy behind the eyes. She wanted a connection to Lexa so badly, she'd been looking in all the wrong places. She'd realized it during the ceremony when he'd so brazenly been everything that Lexa hadn't. Her connection to Lexa didn't need an AI. She loved Lexa, and she always would. It was something she could carry with her. She didn't need Bellamy for that anymore. She just needed Bellamy because he was Bellamy.

Bellamy:

Suddenly there was nothing between them but the lights of the city and the sound of their people. He reached across that strange void and touched her cheek, pushing the hair out of her face.

Kiss her, trust me, it's worth it. Lexa's voice reached out of nowhere to say. He smiled, knowing somehow that it was the last time he'd hear her voice. It was the perfect final advice.

He did as his predecessor so wisely suggested and leaned into Clarke's lips. To his surprise, she partially beat him to it.


End file.
